Archive for April, 2012

1) Negativity in raiding

yes, this really can be done. Yes, you can do this. Stop arguing with me. So tired of hearing from my co-lead that you are all bitching to him. I’m driving this bus, talk to me. Hell talk in raid chat. Conversate. We can work this out.

It’s really not that complicated. It’s not, I swear. I am not a super player. My best asset in a raid is not output, but understanding mechanics. I have great ideas on how everything works. Trust me, we can do this. I understand it might not come easy at first, but we can.

But the flat out refusal to believe? Why am I even trying then?

2) I have heard these questions before

These are the same questions you were asking, while denying you didn’t need a break from raiding. Why are you asking me these questions?

3) Yes, I know you really want your legendary.

I really want you to have it. You know, I have an uncompleted legendary too. This other guy has a legendary. That other server I am on? We’re working on our third staff. I know, frustrating. But really, chill the fuck out. If you want to know why raid leaders as a whole hate the damn things, it cause they cause shit like this. Or drive people to directly disobey their raidleaders to get it completed. (And get ratted out because the people who helped them bragged about it in an alt raid. /facepalm He thought it was funny.)

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General Update

So getting back into blogging, so I am going to take it simple at first.

So let me summarize my health stuff, before I give an update. It has been a long while since I have done one of those.

About six years ago, I began to have a number of strange health issues. My feet began swelling. I began having severe and random muscle aches and pains. I was constantly lethargic and could not maintain my weight. I’ve been heavy all my life, but despite spending the majority of my day walking (and later limping) across a college campus of three blocks, I began to gain weight again. I became highly sensitized to cold, going so far as to sleep under a thick blanket even on nights where the temperature crept towards eighty. In short, I was cold, tired and miserable.

Some people might already recognize these signs as severe hypothyroidism. My doctor at the time had only one answer, “you are fat, lose weight.” Even after my right leg swelled so badly that the skin split in the night, that was the answer. “get up and exercise until you sweat!” Which was great, except I was in severe pain and even when I pushed myself until I was gasping for breath, I did not sweat. All of these should have been signs to my doctor, but they weren’t.

The assistance I got from my doctor was minimal, but I believed her. Why? Because that is part of how we are trained to think. We’re trained to believe that being fat causes all our problems. So, I tried and hated myself for failing, for not being able to move because I was in pain. Blamed myself for being unable to do the things I thought I had to do.
It took years for me to finally look for another doctor. And finally get the courage to speak to someone. But I had to do something, the muscle pains had become unbearable. Worse, we had an extremely hot summer and I overheated because I was not sweating. I had to just suck it up and accept that this wasn’t getting any better.
The new doctor ran blood tests. He actually spoke to me, asked me questions. In a few weeks, I had a diagnosis and medication. In a few months, I saw the first results. We played with the medications and made changes to my diet and my behavior.

In six months, I was no longer having the occasional skin splits. In a year, I no longer had to fear waking up in the middle of the night with muscle aches so bad I wanted to scream. I slowly started to lose weight, the swelling in my legs began to go down and just a few months ago, I started to sweat again.
(A small comment about sweating. It’s REALLY GROSS! I hate it. At the same time, I am so happy to actually do it. It’ll be nice to go through a summer without having to spend an hour in a cool shower just to keep from passing out.)

I am so warm these days, that the husband has taken to closing the door in the computer room and turning on the heat, because I grouch when he tries to turn on the heat in the living room. I haven’t lost as much weight as I would like, but part of that is just being out of the habit of being able to do anything. It’s slow and steady progress, but I am happy. I just wish I had taken control of the situation sooner.

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Right, for those people who are new (within the past year, most likely) This used to be a regular part of my blog. A list of what is annoying me right now.

Here we go

1) The name calling of people who disagree with you over Ji Firepaw (Or any other issue, obviously, but this annoyment came because of the Ji controversy)

Thanks for the neckbeard comment, bro. Yes, I know you just retweeted it. Fantastic. You just called me a neckbeard. Cause that is not nearly as insulting as what you think Ji was doing.

Disagreement is fine, but that shit is uncalled for. From you, I expected better.

2) Working to damn much.

I’m tired. I am hella cranky. Tired and cranky. What does this make me aside from more unpleasant than usual? Oh, that’s right, paranoid. Because being paranoid on top of everything else is so effective.

Screw you brain chemicals. You suck.

3) “I am SO busy”

What? You think I’m sitting at my desk eating bonbons? I’ve got a backlog of filing on my desk. Don’t tell me how you need time off or how busy you are. I’ve put in 60+ hours a week for the past three.

One of you works from home and the other of you works ten minutes from work. I have an hour commute in the morning and an hour (if I am lucky) at night.

the hell with both of you. Oh yeah, and time off… well wouldn’t that be nice.

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